I ran across a handout that Dartmouth College assembled for its employees. The subject of the handout is “workplace bullying.” They use: the following sources to compile this handout: U.S. Substance Abuse & Mental Health Services Administration, U.S. Department of Labor (OSHA) and the Washington State Department of Labor & Industries.
You might be asking yourself, why would I post something on bullying? As a Christian, how we treat others is more than important; it matters to God. If you are reading this you already know the summary of the entire Old Testament according to Jesus: Love God, love people. (See The Great Commandment found in Matthew 22:34-40.)
Last Sunday, I mentioned another character trait that matters: integrity. (Click on the link to listen to what I said about integrity. It is the first 3 minutes or so: https://benbergren.com/sermon-lost-found-sharing-good-news/ ) As a Christian, the things I say and do point to Jesus… even the bad stuff. More than that, we also have been called to be a voice for those who have been marginalized. (“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.” Proverbs 31:8-9). Being aware of what bullying behavior looks like will help all of us be reflective of our own actions and be responsive to anyone who intimidates others.
Here is a portion what Dartmouth College shared with its employees…
When someone snaps at you or ignores you because they are under pressure or in a bad mood, that is not bullying. Bullying involves persistent, abusive, and frightening behavior designed to make the target feel upset, humiliated, and threatened. The following profile fits most bullies:
- Blames others for errors (Deflection)
- Makes unreasonable demands on others
- Criticizes the work ability of others in front of others
- Inconsistent enforcement of arbitrary rules
- Threats of job loss, insults and put downs (abuse of power)
- Downplays or denies accomplishments in others
- Social exclusion of others
- Yells and screams at target (often in front of others)
- Takes credit for another person’s work
- Women are targets of men 69% of the time
- Women are targets of women’s bullying ‘eight to one’ times more often than men are
A Bully Often:
- Seeks to dominate and/or manipulate others
- Enjoys feeling powerful and in control (whether real or not).
- Is both a poor winner (boastful and arrogant) and a poor loser
- Seems to derive satisfaction from other’s fears, discomfort or pain
- Is good at hiding behaviors or doing them where those in authority can’t notice (secretive)
- Is excited by conflicts between others
- Blames others for his/her problems
- Displays uncontrolled anger (rage)
- May have a history of ongoing discipline problems
- Displays a pattern of impulsive and aggressive behaviors
- Displays intolerance
- Lacks empathy towards others
Bethel Lutheran Church and School is definitely a “no bully” zone. I pray that your place of employment, and your home is equally safe.
I pray for all the victims who have been bullied in their life because I can still remember what it feels like to be picked on. If you are currently a victim of a bully, reach out to someone who can help you break this cycle of emotional violence.
God bless,
Pr. Ben